American Idol Jumps the Shark

The announcement of Lee Dewyze as the American Idol rang as loudly and true as Fonzie on a pair of skis. A travesty of a decision, it culminated a season of of truly awful moments. When Lilly, among others, were left at the starting gate, failing to make the top 12, the sniff of doom lurked about. In every case, except for perhaps Crystal and Siobhan, the American people chose the blander of the competitors.

Simon slept walked through the season, Randy was dawged out, Kara was uninspiring, and Ellen seemed mostly lost. Unique and clever song choices were few and far between. Product placement dominated and made me feel like I was watching one long commercial.

So why fight or care about this tired, old program? Because there are damn few things that Americans hold in common enough to talk about any more. Our moments of social symmetry are becoming fewer and fewer. It sounds trite, but it's a water cooler show that brings diverse people together to share commentary and common experience. In this day of multi-hundred channel televisions, an Internet with millions of choices, cell phones that in my opinion are actually driving us apart instead of together, it is refreshing to have something that everybody can talk about.

So rather than abandon it altogether, I would like to discuss some possible solutions. If it is at all technologically possible, they need to do what they can to enforce limited voting. It is ridiculous to try to have a fair contest when tweeners are sending their phones into robo-call overdrive. Let's use technology to limit each phone to only a small number of calls. With repeat voting eliminated, we might get a fairer representation of an Idol.

Secondly, let's increase judge input, as they do in Dancing with the Stars. Include mentor(s) each week who specialize in the area of music being highlighted that week. Have the judges and mentors rank each of the contestants, average the ranks, and then blend it in with the public vote.

Thirdly, have only two regular judges, and then rotate in one to three judges. The panel and opinion will look fresh and different every time.

Fourth, cut the product placement crap - you're already making enough money. cut the inside jokes - I don't care what Kara and Ryan might be smirking about.

Fifth, improve the song selection. I don't know if the problem is the list of songs they have to choose from, or if the contestants are trying too much to play it safe. Some songs should be retired, virtually anything by Whitney Houston, for example. I so wished that Shioban would have tooken on Roy Orbison, or done Live and Let die in McCartney week.

So help with other suggestions here. If you have other ideas to help other shows become water cooler shows, let me know those too.

Thanks America, for rewarding Captain Pitchy. May we do better in the future.

Oil's Not Well in the Gulf

How devastating is the oil spill in the Gulf? Will it "magically dissipate" in the vast ocean per Rushy Limbaugh? Will it permanently end the Gulf as we know it, destroying coral reefs, fishing industries and coastlines? I imagine it will end up somewhere in between, although the longer the leak continues, the more it will confirm the worries of the second question.

I'm not an environmental scientist (although my son is). I know there have been other serious spills, in addition to the Exxon Valdez. But this seems particularly onerous to me. I think we'll be seeing effects of this for many years to come. I'm concerned not just for the coastline, but what it is doing to the ecology of the Gulf as a whole, not to mention the compounding effect of the chemical dispersants being used.

Whatever the impact, I think all political sides can agree that this is not a good thing. This is a particularly difficult conundrum for conservatives. You either have to advocate we stop drilling in these spots where such devastation can take place when something goes wrong, or you have to support increased government regulation and oversight to prevent this from ever occurring again. Watching the cartoon style avoidance of responsibility at the recent Congressional hearing should convince even the most stalwart corporatist that regulation is indispensable.

The government has it's share of blame, but that's because of it's inability to regulate, it's caving to corporate donors, it's deferral in the simplest fundamentals of oversight. But make no mistake where the vast majority of responsibility lies. This country was run by two oil executives for eight years. Congress has been rendered ineffective by a combination of Republican extremists and Blue Dog Democrats willing to sell their soul to the highest corporate bidder. Anybody who thinks progressives control our government paid absolutely no attention to the health care debate.

All this fuss for a fungible fuel source that will not help us domestically, goes into a big global pot, increasing the oil supply by the tiniest of fractions. We need to concentrate on the technologies of the future, to help make America independent, proud, and leading the world once again to a brighter tomorrow.