Dangling at Cliff's Edge

The Cliffs of Mohr in Ireland.

They are beautiful,

But also a little scary to someone who has a bit of a fear of heights.

And now, I feel like I am metaphorically dangling at their edge, hanging on by my fingertips.

No, I am not suicidal.  But I do feel like I am at the edge of something that if I am not careful, I will fall and not be able to recover.

I went to get some annual lab work done a week ago.  Just something the doctor has me do once in a while, one of the consequences of getting older.

The nurse called with the results yesterday.  It seems everything is normal - except for one thing.  And it's something that's been creeping up for a while now.

My blood sugar readings are now at the edge, the very edge, between prediabetic and diabetic.  Just a fraction of an inch more up, and I would be falling, identified as diabetic.

The nurse was ready for me to start a drug called Metformin.  Some of you may have had positive experiences with this drug.  Not in my world.  I have people close to me who have been harmed by this drug, some mildly and others devastatingly.  So, no.  Hard pass on Metformin for me.

It was decided (mostly by me) that I would get a reprieve.  I will get another reading in March and see if it has gotten better or worse.

I discussed with a relative who has been dealing with similar issues, told them my readings, and they agreed that it may be something I can improve through diet and exercise. So, yes, that is what I'm going to try to do.

And I will.  I have a loving wife who will work with me every step of the way.  Yes, I am a human butterball, but I'm stronger willed than most people think.  I know how to sacrifice and show discipline.  And with the metformin gun to my head, if I can pull myself by the fingertips off this cliff, I will do it.

Part of what is happening in our medical culture is a change in the definition of who is diabetic.  They changed the standards a while back, and it is part of why the number of identified diabetics has exploded in this country.  People's behavior has not worsened, although the over-consumption of processed foods is a huge problem.  I told the nurse practitioner there was no diabetes in my family, at least from my parents and ancestors, and he told me there probably was - the standards were different!

Why?  I'm sure there are valid medical reasons for it, but this country being what it is, with such outsize influence by Big Pharma, you can't help but wonder if part of it isn't just to sell more drugs.

So, wish me luck.  I'm old, and my body is stubborn.  I'm going to exercise and get fit (fitter).  I will keep going to the foot doctor and do whatever I can to make sure my foot problems do not interfere with an exercise routine.  I will do my best to eat based on the recommendations of the Dash diet and the Prediabetes Cookbook.  Alison is knowledgeable and smart and, although fine now, has diabetes in her family history, and is more than willing to adopt out food plans right along with me.

I will pull myself off this cliff.