I know what they're saying.
Still, it's Christmas. And Christmas at the Harley clan means big family gatherings. There are so many of us that some years we rent out the Dixon Hall out near the lake.
Not this year. We're going to meet at Grandpa Harley's farm. If the weather is nice, we'll meet outside. We got picnic tables and a tent, a big tent that sometimes our church uses for revivals. If the weather is bad, we'll just gather inside, screw the precautions.
It won't be as crowded as some years. Aunt Fresca and her entire family won't be there. She's our family liberal, and she's a maskaholic. She's a nurse and overly sensitive if you ask me. I mean, haven't some of the hospital personnel been vaccinated? Maybe not here. I hadn't heard yet.
That still leaves several dozen people who will descend on Grandpa's farm on Christmas afternoon. My brother Chuck will once again dress up as Santa; Chuck's a big guy, even for Santa, topping out somewhere over three hundred pounds. It'll be too late to ask Santa for presents, but not too late to hug and kiss him.
Nobody will wear a mask. Maybe Charlene. She likes to be dramatic, a real hypochondriac telling us all the time about her diabetes and heart condition, all the while she's shoveling chocolate candy under her mask.
Someone who won't be there is Grandma Harley. Except in spirit. Sadly, she passed away two weeks after Thanksgiving. Did she have COVID? I don't know. Grandma had a lot of problems, so it could have been anything. There was a positive test, but there are a lot of false positives out there. That's what I heard on Newsmax - a lot of unrelated deaths are being attributed to COVID because the doctors are trying to push up the numbers so they can get more money and stuff.
The funeral was the last time the family got together. The funeral people, Davis Funeral Home, insisted everyone wear a mask at the viewing. They didn't have the power to control New Life Baptist Church, where a massive service was held. After that, New Life closed for a week, but it's up and running for Christmas. Pastor Dan says it would be ungodly not to hold Christmas services. I confess. I didn't go. I'm a devout Christian, I swears, I just didn't go very much. Yes, sometimes I want to stick it to the libs and atheists and show up, but then it gets to Sunday morning, and I just go, "Not this Sunday. I'd rather take it easy. It's been a long week operating the trash truck, and I need a break. Maybe next Sunday."
Grandpa's children, all six minus Fresca, confabbed about whether and how to hold the Harley Christmas party. Grandpa insisted it was what Grandma would have wanted. She wanted to look down from heaven and see all her family gathered for the most important day of the year, the day Jesus was born, and began his journey to sacrifice himself for our sins.
Darlene, the youngest of the bunch (and my Mama), suggested putting up the revival tent and centering outdoors. Grandpa reluctantly agreed, although he said he would spend as much time as possible in the parlor amidst the photographs and lingering scent of his beloved wife. And, outdoors or not, he expected people to come to see him and pay tribute to her memory.
Me? Yeah, whatever. I'll go anywhere. Family trumps fear. Ha! See how I used the word trump? Ain't I clever? Just like the name of the one true President who rules us all, the real winner of the election. Can't believe that Kemp was in cahoots with Hugo Chavez putting in a bunch of rigged voting machines. What were the machines called? Dominatrix? Something like that. And now there's supposed to be a runoff where two Republicans have to be in a runoff with Radical Liberal Atheist Democrats? I know. Warnock is some kind of preacher, I guess, but it ain't no proper church. Not like New Life. It preaches socialism, gushing money to the undeserving, and advocating getting rid of our cops. Well, I'll show them! The hell if I'm gonna vote in that rigged mess! Ain't worth my time!
Masks are a show of weakness. It smells of cowardice. And I won't be a coward. I won't have wimps like Pretend President Biden tell me what to do! I got personal liberty to do and go where I want! I ain't no health hazard! I been around people since the start, and I ain't sick! Well, not right now, anyway. There was that time just before Thanksgiving, but it wasn't much, and screw you if I was going in for a test. Nobody was gonna stop me from Thanksgiving and seeing Grandma Harley, and you know? I'm glad I did because it was my last chance to see her.
And now, with our presents opened and our stomachs ready for a big old meal, it was time to go to the big Harley Christmas party. The weather is a little cold and windy, so we may spend more time inside than otherwise.
But that's okay. Life is too short to live in fear.
Way too short.
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