God and Sex

It's so simple, really.  He tried to distill it down for us.

Love God.  Love your neighbor.

The rest, as the old Jewish saying goes, is commentary.

Jesus tried to make the law clear and simple for us.  The Pharisees, with their constant restrictions and superstitions, drove him crazy.  They did not take into account that the intent of the law is not meticulous commands, it is about the effect and intent of what you do.

It is the law to obey the Sabbath.

It is not the law to allow harm to come to another in order to preserve the Sabbath.  If someone needs healing and comfort, you do it.  If a sheep needs to be rescued, you do it.

It's not playing cards, or dancing, or gambling that is evil.  It is doing anything to the extent that it harms your relationship with God, your fellow man and your family.  It's not a sin to buy a $1 lottery ticket (how wise of an investment it is, is a separate issue).  It is a sin to take family money meant to feed the family or help others and place it on a bet.

So is sex a sin?

No, of course not.  Sex in and of itself is not a sin.

Sin is the separation of yourself from God, and by doing so, deliberately separating yourself off, and harming your fellow man.  Sin is not a list of do's and don't.  Why, you can play Hearts but not poker.  You have to rotate your crops in a certain way, you have to grow your hair a certain length, you cannot eat shellfish.  All of these things and more are specifically forbidden in the bible.  But they are cultural taboos, not sin taboos.  Jesus freed us from all that.  He gave us the greatest power and gift of all.

He gave us the power to think.

So how do we wade through the dozens of do's and don't that are presented in the bible, some of which contradict each other?  Even marriage itself is defined different ways in the bible.  Multiple wives were all the rage for awhile.  Handmaidens abound.  Jesus advocated leaving your family to follow him.  Paul argued for celibacy because he though the second coming was imminent.

Much of what is in the Bible about sex is about Bedouin culture and male property rights.  How else would you explain handing your daughter over to her rapist?

Although Jesus did not address much about sexuality directly, it is quite clear that he is supportive of the main theme threaded throughout the bible, which becomes much clearer when you focus on the STORY rather than cultural do's and don'ts.  The greatest sins are those of the powerful exploiting the powerless.  No theme or sin is focused more in the bible than on that one.  We turn our back on God when we turn our back on each other.

So when is sex a sin?  When is it evil?  It's not an arbitrary taboo or rule.  It is when it is exploitative, when it is designed to dominate, enslave or hurt someone.  Physical and/or verbal dominance is always wrong.  Pedophilia and bestiality is wrong because of the harm it does to innocents, and because all the power is attributed to one party.

Sexual sin can appear in any relationship, even in marriage between an adult man and woman. Anything that is deliberately destructive to love and mutual respect and equality is wrong.  And it cannot be defined by specific sex acts.

Sex is not wrong when it is consensual, loving and caring.

Being gay is not a sin.  Participating in loving, consensual sexual acts with another adult of the same sex does not make you a sinner.  It makes you gay.

God doesn't make arbitrary rules to torture us.  He wants us to be what we are.  He wants us to be loving and caring, not judgmental and cruel.

With all the pain and injustice in the world, don't we have something better to do than to interfere with loving relationships?  Wouldn't it be a better use of time and Christian energy to reach out to those in genuine need - the poor, the sick, those in emotional pain and turmoil - than to focus on intolerance?

It was easy to say, wasn't it?

Love God.  Love your neighbor.

So easy to say.  So difficult to put into practice.

But we must try, my friend.  We must try.